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My name is C Fish

My name is C Fish and I’m an alcoholic. It means that sometimes life feels awesome like I can drop in and bust every trick. But often it means I slam hard to the bottom of the bowl. Sometimes I don’t know how to get back up. Other times I’m the one reaching to pick another up. I come from a past full of wounds. Being sober means I feel every last one of them. Even ones I didn’t know I had. I come from almost 19 years of skate punk and an alcoholic bloodline. So not surprising how things ended up. There are times I simply don’t understand how I feel about things. Addiction is the mental and emotional equivalent of a chronic physical illness. It’s like you’re either on fire and can’t get it together enough to put yourself out or you’re the bad ass putting out every fire with a skill beyond you. Everyday is a fist fight. You do what you can to have people to reach out to. Though if you’re an addict you likely have burned a great many bridges.